October 22, 2018
Are self-limiting thinking and a lack of authenticity holding you back from getting a promotion, landing a better job, or starting a new business? How do you get past that and go from “I think I can” to “I know I can”?
“If you think you’re not experienced enough, not skilled enough, not whatever enough, that’s a lie,” said Regina Huber during the Women’s Leadership Center’s live event, “Show Up with Power and Authenticity to Create the Success You Want,” in September.
“I want to invite you to put your excuses to one side, because there is no better time,” said Huber, the founder and CEO of Transform Your Performance. She is a leadership coach and diversity strategist and the author of Speak up, Stand out and Shine (Regina Huber, 2016).
The power of ridding yourself of limiting, self-conscious patterns and achieving what you want comes from showing your worth, your uniqueness, and your brilliance, Huber said. There are several steps toward that transformation, including:
Taking risks and standing out in a crowd. Success is about passion and hard work, but you have to find a way to distinguish yourself as well. “If you want something really bad, sometimes you have to take a risk,” Huber said. “Leaders don’t blend in; leaders stand out. And standing out requires courage.”
Sharing your uniqueness. “The world needs exactly you,” Huber said. “No one shares the exact same background as you…no one like you will ever walk on this planet again.” And that means your character traits as well as your skills. “Sharing your quirks, anything that makes you unique, is really valuable,” she pointed out. Maybe that means wearing a red dress and chunky heels—because that calls to you—when everyone else is in a suit and pumps.
Adopting positive body language. “Fifty-five percent of how others perceive you is about your body language,” Huber told the audience. Your state of mind influences how you carry yourself and how other people experience you, but how you carry yourself can also impact your state of mind, she said. What speaks louder and faster than anything else in meetings and negotiations is our energy.
She suggested following the advice of the Amy Cuddy TED talk on “power posing.” Hold a power pose (standing tall with your hands on your hips like Wonder Woman, or throwing your arms wide open, for instance) for two minutes before giving a presentation or before a job interview. “It makes us feel more powerful and confident, and changes how we show up to the world,” Huber said. “You have access to this power all the time.” Huber has introduced the concept of “Power Dancing” as well, dancing to powerful music using broad movements to release stress and tension and connect with your body.
Thinking empowering thoughts. Research has shown that about 90% of what we think about is repetitive. “It’s really important to become the observers of our thoughts, and to get rid of those ‘viruses,’” she said.
“We ask the wrong questions,” Huber noted. “Instead of ‘What if I can achieve that?’ we ask, ‘What if I can’t?’” Asking a positive question can help us change our programming—“upgrade the software”—so that we can create our visions and dreams. “As you rewire, you can achieve things that previously seemed impossible,” she said.
Stepping out of victim mode. When Huber was fleeced by a business partner earlier in her career, it cost her almost everything she had. “As we grow through our lessons, however painful they might be sometimes, we become stronger and we can create something even better,” she said. The experience showed her that she had to take responsibility for allowing that person into her life. “It taught me to take responsibility for my entire life,” she said, “to step out of victim mode into empowerment. From then on, my life would never be the same.”
Everyone can have a transformation like that. “You have that power,” Huber said. “It’s your time to do the work you love, to have the business you want, and to have the career you want.”